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width="1" height="1" //divpI am not an alcoholic but I do have a problem with drink. I rarely get
properly drunk - maybe two or three times a year - but when I do, it's on a shameful, monumental
scale. Historically, this has often coincided with the Christmas party season./ppThis year,
however, will be different. Or that is the idea, at least./ppSix months ago, after I found myself
telling friends yet another "hilarious" tale of a drunken incident, I embarked on a self-imposed
period of alcoholic awareness, designed to remove the possibility of ever again being incapacitated
by drink. I realised that unless I could find a way to avoid my epic displays I would be forced
down the route of the alcoholic and have to give up drink completely. I was going to have to learn
to deal with one drink at a time. Here's what I, and others in my position, have
discovered./ppstrongFirst, establish whether you have a drink problem/strong/ppThis is easier said
than done. Hypnotherapist Georgia Foster, author of The Drink Less Mind (Foster Publishing) and a
specialist in helping people gain control around alcohol, says: "Sometimes we all drink too much.
The odd, one-off 'blitzing it' moment is fine. But if it's a regular occurrence and it's not in
check, that's a problem." That may be the case for many, but although my drunkenness was
infrequent, to me, those blitzes felt problematic. Tania Glyde, author of Cleaning Up: How I Gave
Up Drinking and Lived (Serpent's Tail), agrees that defining the extent of your drink problem is
often subjective. "When I gave up drinking, lots of people said to me, 'You weren't that big a
drinker'. Some people are able to drink huge amounts and not worry about it. I think you only have
a problem when you reach your personal limit of shame."/ppSarah (not her real name), 29, faced this
question three years ago. Now a personal trainer, she used to work in the City where binge drinking
after work was common. "I wasn't an alcoholic in that I didn't need to drink every day," she says.
"But if I went out, I had only to have one glass and I just wanted to keep on and on. Every time I
drank, it would result in me getting drunk. I didn't have any control." She was becoming
increasingly miserable, smoking more and overeating, too./ppstrongTry hypnotherapy/strong/ppIn 2005
Sarah saw a hypnotherapist for 12 one-hour sessions which, she says, helped re-programme her mind,
and convince her that she has control over her actions. It also helped her deal with other issues
which were causing her stress and exacerbating her binge drinking. She now finds it easy to stop at
two or three units. (She has also stopped smoking.) "I am at a point where I will happily say
during an evening's drinking, 'Shall we just have a cup of tea?' instead of, 'Come on, let's do
some shots'."/ppstrongBe proactive, and prepared to lie/strong/ppSince her successful hypnotherapy
sessions, Sarah still follows some tried and tested practical steps to help control her drinking.
And I can vouch for the fact that these tips work even if you haven't been hypnotised (I've always
found hypnotism a bit freaky). "Always order a glass of water with every alcoholic drink," says
Sarah, "and drink them simultaneously. Stick to small drinks: be firm if someone insists on you
having a large glass. If they complain, tell them you prefer small glasses because the drink stays
colder." Be prepared for hostility, she adds: "A few people I used to work with did not respond to
it well because they felt it was a judgment on them. I would just say: 'Get lost.'"/ppIf it gets
too much, says Foster, resort to fibbing. "Pretend you're taking antibiotics, that you have a big
meeting the next day or that you have a hangover. Drinking less can be a big social problem -
people feel guilty about it. They feel they have to fit in with the social environment by drinking
too much." In my experience, this is not always the case: I was with a very drunk friend the other
night and apologised for ordering a Diet Coke. "You don't have to jushtify yourself to me," he
slurred. The truth is, most people are too distracted by their own drinking to notice yours./ppThe
other advice I have assiduously followed over the past six months is screamingly obvious, but it
works. "It's all common sense really - eat before going out," says Don Shenker, chief executive of
Alcohol Concern. "And don't drink in rounds," he adds, "because you feel obliged to have another
drink even if you don't really want one." That sounds a bit Scrooge-like to me. My advice is: buy
rounds if you can afford it, just exclude yourself if you want to. /ppstrongIf you can't manage
alcohol-free days, you are in trouble/strong/ppHaving a few days a week when you don't drink at all
is crucial for gaining control of your alcohol consumption, says Foster. But seven out of 10 of her
clients are bemused when she advises this. "Most of the people I see have drunk pretty much every
day since they went to university." Personally, I can go for days without drinking, though, and
then have no idea of moderation when I do drink. Commonly, people who are infrequent binge drinkers
are perfectionists, says Foster. "They're very good when they're not drinking, but as soon as they
drink, their rebelliousness comes out and they become "perfect" at doing the opposite of what
they're supposed to. When I work with someone like that I try to tell them to stop driving the
system so perfectly - because something is going to give." This is me all over./ppstrongExercise
extreme vigilance around free booze/strong/pp"There is a real attitude of, 'If it's free, we are
obliged to consume it'," says Glyde. "It seems rude not to swipe as much free alcohol as possible."
Plus, alcohol is not called a social lubricant for nothing: "Work-related parties can be so
intimidating," she says. "Especially if you are supposed to be networking. Everyone is looking over
their shoulders, gimlet-eyed. The pressure of having to act like someone you're not brings out the
child in all of us. I can remember spitting wine over a company director once and thinking, 'Aren't
I clever? I'm really pissed, but I don't care.'" If you are aware of all these factors, have
admitted to yourself that you are nervous or intimidated, then you don't have to get caught up in
them./ppShenker's key party survival suggestion is to avoid top-ups from waiters: "Finish your
glass and pick up a fresh one so you know exactly how much you've had. Decide in advance how much
you are going to drink and stick to it."/ppstrongIf in doubt, don't drink at all/strong/ppIf you
are like me, then there will be some times in your life - periods of stress, anxiety or childish
over-excitement - when you are better off not drinking because the risk of getting trolleyed is too
high. Taking the car is my top tip for complete alcohol avoidance in these situations. When I first
resolved never to get drunk again I drove everywhere for weeks and drank nothing. Once you've done
that for a while, when you start drinking again you can re-learn your limits. Now I know how I feel
after one glass (not much different to sober), how I feel after two (a bit merry), and after three
(disastrously drunk and ready to become more so). For the first time in my life I have an idea of
when I am supposed to stop. I can say from experience that it is far more rewarding than letting
gravity decide./pdiv style="float: left; margin-right: 10px; margin-bottom: 10px;"ullia
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Recommandations
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and reject those that you are not interested in
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