Doesn’t it just warm the cockles of your heart to flip through Previews and see what joyous stuff awaits you? And what exactly are the cockles of your heart? Ah, who cares! There are comics to pre-order!

Let’s get to it!

Dark Horse:

There’s another volume (the third) of Herbie Archives on page 35 (29 April). If that’s your thing.

On page 37 (1 April), we finally get a Turok: Son of Stone Archive edition that we’ve so desperately wanted and deserved! American Indians versus dinosaurs! How can you resist?

DC:

Okay, I don’t get the cover of Batman #686 (page 66; 11 February). All the villains are ceremoniously walking into the Dew Drop Inn (of “the dude dropped in at the Dew Drop Inn” fame)? What’s that all about?

I don’t really care all that much, but am I supposed to know something about the “Origins and Omens” tag that accompanies several DC books in this month’s Previews?

So Batman: Confidential brings us a story arc on page 69 (11 February) by four people who are very good at what they do: Christina Weir, Nunzio DeFilippis, Jose Luis Garcia-Lopez, and Kevin Nowlan. So why am I not super-enthusiastic about it? King Tut? Really? Sheesh.

I wouldn’t want anyone to interpret this as a slight against Geoff Johns, who is of course the greatest writer - not just comics writer, but writer - in recorded history, but on page 78, we get text about “the orange light of avarice.” Are any of the other Lantern lights good ones? And if they’re not, why isn’t a Green Lantern always consumed by jealousy? I’m just wondering. In no way is this impugning the absolute genius of Mr. Johns, whose tears, I’m well informed, cure polio.

I have no idea if The Mighty (page 81; 4 February) is any good or not, but does the world really need another “bold new super hero epic”? Really?

On page 85, R.E.B.E.L.S. #1 debuts (11 February). Again, I have no idea if it’s good or not, but I like the text: “The future is now in this all-new monthly series!” “The future”? Isn’t this a deliberate evocation of a series from 15 years ago?

It’s certainly nice of DC to offer a softcover version of Shazam!: The Monster Society of Evil (page 92; 4 March). I don’t understand DC’s policy of waiting decades before releasing things in softcover, but maybe I’ll finally read this!

Ambush Bug gets a Showcase volume on page 95 (25 March). As Ambush Bug stories are largely gag reels, the fact that it’s uncolored shouldn’t be a big deal. The five issues in here that I’ve read are hilarious.

I probably won’t buy Bang! Tango (maybe as a trade) on page 110 (4 February), but the solicitation text cracks me up: “A passionate ex-gangster tries to make good in his second life as a tango dancer.” Good stuff! Joe Kelly seems to do better when he’s not writing superheroes, so this might be worthwhile.

100 Bullets comes to an end (page 114; 11 February), and you can get all twelve trades on page 115. I know some people are bored with this, but I think it’s fantastic. Azzarello better not screw up the ending, though!

Air #7 is a dollar (page 116; 18 March). I may not buy it based on what happens in the next few issues, but that’s nice of DC to try to goose sales in this way.

Image:

I saw a bit of Soul Kiss, Steven T. Seagle’s new book (page 140; 11 February), at San Diego this past summer, and it looks pretty cool. It’s the story of a girl who needs to save her boyfriend from the Devil, so she needs to find ten innocent souls and send them to Hell. Well, that can’t be pleasant. Seagle writes very good stuff quite often, so I’ll have to check this out.

Joe Kelly shows up with a new book on page 142 (4 February) called Bad Dog, which is a high-concept tale of two bounty hunters - one of whom is a werewolf. I still haven’t read Kelly’s Deadpool (I’m working on getting the back issues), but Image wants us to believe it’s in the same vein, so if that appealed to you, perhaps this will.

Another Man of Action guy, Duncan Rouleau, has a nifty-sounding book on page 144 (18 February). The Great Unknown is the story of a man whose thoughts become reality, although it sounds more complicated than that. I’m waiting for DC to release a softcover of Rouleau’s Metal Men, but even if that went off the rails (which I heard it did), I’m still looking forward to this.

You know, just after I finally pick up Codeflesh this year, Image decides to release a new, full-color collection with a brand new story (page 146; 25 February). Thanks, Image! Grrrr … Yes, it’s 35 bucks, but it’s pretty damned cool.

Jersey Gods (page 150; 4 February): a god of war marries a girl from the Garden State. What’s not to love?

Displaced Persons is re-offered on page 154 (4 February). I’m glad, because I was wondering where it had gone.

I wonder what happened to Elephantmen. Image keeps soliciting it (#21 is on page 157 for 11 February), but it’s been a while since an issue came out. Maybe they should stop soliciting it until it can get back on track. I hope it’s not in trouble, because it’s so freakin’ good.

A while back, commenters were wondering if Ted McKeever’s Metropol would ever show up in a collection. Well, on page 169, it has shown up in a collection! It’s the third volume of the Ted McKeever Library that Image is offering. I just read volume one (Transit), which wasn’t great, but is still pretty keen.

Marvel:

The only way I’m buying Black Panther #1 (page 10) is if T’Challa gets a sex change. That would be too awesome for words.

As much as I want to buy the Agents of Atlas ongoing (page 13), I wonder if Marvel is going to sneak a $3.99 price onto it with the “giant-sized” first issue at 4 bucks and then “regular-sized” issues at the same price. They wouldn’t be that sneaky, would they? Still, an Agents of Atlas ongoing is probably going to be super-duper.

It’s interesting that Marvel is killing Ultimate Fantastic Four and Ultimate X-Men (pages 24-25). I really wish they would kill all the Ultimate books except that Spidey one and just let Bendis do his thing with that. The rest of the line is pretty worthless these days.

Page 26: Ultimate Wolverine vs. Hulk, March 2009. Bwah-ha-ha-ha! (If you don’t know why this is funny, Mike Sterling explains it all!)

Marvel tries the anthology thing again with Astonishing Tales #1 (page 34). I remain convinced there’s a way to publish an anthology without charging 4 dollars for it, which will kill this book faster than my endorsement of it would! But we’ll see.

It’s somewhat stunning that Marvel is publishing a book called Models, Inc. (page 51). First, because it’s obvious that they’re trying to evoke the awesome television show by that name that we all hold dear in our hearts, but more because it’s just … weird. So weird I’m tempted to buy it!

I like how the solicitation text on page 70 for X-Men Origins: Sabretooth reads, “Why IS he so vicious? Why IS he so brutal?” I emphasize the present tense just because Sabretooth is still dead, right? Marvel doesn’t even pretend that the death of a character means anything anymore, which is perversely satisfying.

Cloak and Dagger gets a hardcover on page 94. I’ve never read it, but come on - it’s Mantlo and Leonardi!

As we move to the dreaded back of the book, we come across page 205 and Ape Entertainment, which offers The Black Coat & Athena Voltaire One-Shot for two thin dollars. I’m really dying for new issues of The Black Coat and a new series of Athena Voltaire, but I’ll take this!

I honestly can’t recommend anything Banzai Girls, such as the Banzai Girls Annual 2009 from Arcana Studio on page 207, but the way the text describes creator Jinky Coronado is awesome: as a “fan-favorite FHM and calendar model/artist/writer.” Grant Morrison can’t even claim that!

Lots of trades from Avatar, if that’s your thing. Streets of Glory comes out on page 218, Doktor Sleepless gets the treatment on page 219, and just for the heck of it, you can get a five-issue pack of Anna Mercury on page 220. You might like them all in one shot instead of doled out slowly! Plus, you can order Aetheric Mechanics if you missed it the first time around. Dang, it’s good.

Bluewater Productions brings us Female Force: Sarah Palin (page 222). Yes, we’re in Hell. Isn’t this a tad late? Or did I miss an election? (To be fair, Bluewater is bringing out a Michelle Obama comic soon, so there’s that.)

More Humanoids on page 232, as Devil’s Due brings us The Zombies That Ate the World, with art by Guy Davis. I have never been into the zombie thing in movies or comics, but I’m sure this will look pretty cool!

Dabel Brothers Publishing brings us something on page 250 we’ve all been yearning for: The Warriors Official Movie Adaptation!!!!!! What better way to celebrate a 30-year-old movie?!?!?!? I never saw the appeal of The Warriors, to be honest. But at least the comic is here!

If you’ve been tossing and turning at night wondering where Greg LaRocque has been (and who hasn’t, really?), he brings us a new series on page 264 called The Dreaming from Exiled Studios. DC lawyers on Line One! This is 10 bucks for 54 pages, but it does sound interesting.

Look at IDW, releasing Whatmen, a Watchmen parody written by Scott Lobdell. It’s on page 277. Good to see Lobdell getting work!

IDW also has a full-color Next Men hardcover on page 283. It’s 50 bucks for 11 issues, and I have to say - the black-and-white softcover versions IDW has published are just dandy.

Hey, look what Oni Press has on page 296! It’s volume 5 of Bryan Lee O’Malley’s magnum opus, Scott Pilgrim! This time, he takes on the universe! You may like this. I, because I have no soul, do not.

Radical Publishing has a new title called Hotwire: Requiem for the Dead. It was created by Warren Ellis but is written and drawn by Steve Pugh. This is, I suppose, why Pugh is no longer doing Shark-Man. This new book better be the greatest book since the Bible to justify taking Pugh away from Shark-Man!!!!!!

If you like all your robotic awesomeness in one shot instead of in monthly doses, Red 5 Comics offers the trade of the second Atomic Robo series on page 301. It isn’t quite finished yet, but I certainly can recommend it based on the 80% of the series that has already seen the light.

Based on the sales figures, many people have been skipping The Straw Men from Zenescope. That’s too bad, because it’s quite good. If you’ve skipped it because it’s hard to find, the publishers helpfully offer the first three issues in one package for 3 measly dollars on page 334! Can you afford to pass on a bargain like that????

On page 340, Tripwire has a “Superhero Special” for 8 bucks. Tripwire is a wonderful comics magazine, and issues rarely appear, but they’re definitely worth it.

That’s it for this month. Have a grand time flipping through Previews! And, I ought to remind you, you have about a day to enter my contest!

• At November 29, 2008, Michael wrote:

  You don't recognize a wake when you see one, Greg?

• At November 29, 2008, Justin Hilyard wrote:

  "And what exactly are the cockles of your heart?"

  It's another word for ventricle, because they're sort of shaped like cockle ...